No matter how much you love your spouse, you might not love your in-laws. Learning how to navigate these family matters is a crucial skill in a healthy marriage. Today, we’re learning about some critical questions every newlywed or young and married couple needs to ask about their spouse’s family of origin.

First off, think of your spouse’s family of origin like a marinade. What has he/she been “marinating” in for 18+years? We are all products of our families. The good, the bad, and the ugly. It’s important to understand your spouse’s family dynamics and how you might help them to break free of destructive patterns that could affect your marriage.

I list some helpful questions that you should ask even before you get married.

1. What did you most admire about your parents?
2. What is your mom’s / dad’s greatest strength?
3. How did your parents resolve conflict?
4. How did your parents approach spiritual issues?

A complete list of questions to ask your spouse about your in-laws

I also share a few tips to remember whenever you’re talking to your spouse about their family. Remember “Yo Mama!” jokes? Yeah . . . it’s best not to trash talk your in-laws. That usually doesn’t go over well. Even if your spouse is upset at his/her parents, they are still his/her parents, and that loyalty runs deep. It’s better to ask curious questions and offer support than bash the family your spouse grew up in.

In this episode, I give five helpful tips for managing your expectations with your in-laws, including not “becoming little.” You’ve got to listen to this part of the episode. I know I’m speaking directly to many of you who are dealing with this now!

Take a listen to the full episode and let me know what you think by rating and reviewing the podcast.

• Facing Your Fiance’s Family of Origin
• The Power of Forgiveness in Relationships
• Need Marriage or Relationship Coaching?

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