Episode Summary:

Does it ever seem like God loves other people more than he loves you? Maybe it looks like everything goes their way. Or their families are put together, not a prodigal in sight, and everyone enjoys each other. We, however, see our lives at a hot mess, unanswered prayers everywhere, and trouble after trouble. When we equate blessing and favor with love, we can begin to feel rejected and abandoned by God when we don’t feel blessed or favored by him. In this episode, my co-host, Rev. Jessica Van Roekel and I talk about Overcoming Rejection and Abandonment with God’s Love.

Almost all of us carry rejection and abandonment because most of us have experienced someone walking away, excluding us, or making us feel like we don’t belong. Those wounds run deep. They are not just “hurt feelings.”

They can shape how we see ourselves, how we relate to others, and how we imagine God sees us. Today we want to walk into the truth that Christ’s love actually heals these hurt places.

Quotables from the episode:

• Rejection isn’t just a moment. It’s a story our hearts can start telling us, and often on repeat. It says, “See? You’re not enough.” “See? People always leave.” “See? You’re not worth choosing.” The rejection narrative comes from the oldest human experiences: a parent who wasn’t present, a spouse who checked out emotionally, a friend group that stopped inviting us, a church that didn’t know what to do with our pain.
• I’m not going to be everyone’s cup of tea and they’re not mine, my value or lack thereof in someone else’s eyes doesn’t determine my worth. Even those who know me the most, only know a small piece of me, but God knows me completely.
• It’s that time of year when love seems to be commercialized, but Christ’s love isn’t for sale. It’s offered freely…
• If you’ve ever felt unwanted, unseen, or left—Jesus understands. You are not alone.
• That’s why Romans 12:2 is so powerful. It says, “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Our minds are powerful and what we tell ourselves matters. Your brain listens to your thoughts. When you think something like “I can’t handle this” or “I am loved”, your brain treats that thought as important information. It begins to adjust your mood, your energy, and even your physical reactions based on what you’re saying to yourself.
• 5 practical ways Jesus Christ’s love heals the wounds from rejection and abandonment.
• We can’t heal what we hide.
• Every rejection writes a script in our minds.
• Healing doesn’t begin with convincing ourselves people won’t leave. Healing begins when we realize Jesus Christ’s love stays.

Scripture References:

• Jeremiah 31:3 NIV “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness”
• John 6:38 “For I have come down from heaven, not to do my own will but the will of him who sent me.”
• Isaiah 53:3 says, “He was despised and rejected by humanity by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain. Like one from whom people hide their faces he was despised, and we held him in low esteem.”
• Hebrews 13:5 “Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’”
• Deuteronomy 31:6 “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”
• Romans 12:2 “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
• Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
• John 15:9 “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love”
• 1 Peter 2:9 “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light”
• Ephesians 1:4 “In love, he destined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will”
• Isaiah 43:1b “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine”
• John 15:4 “Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.”

Recommended Resources:

• Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue

Social Media Links for Host and Guest:

Connect with Rev. Jessica Van Roekel:

Website / Instagram / Facebook

Connect with Dr. Bengtson:

Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple

Co-Host:

Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don’t need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God’s transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God’s expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson

Audio Technical Support: Ashton Bengtson

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