Emily Rose Massey explores biblical marriage, selflessness, forgiveness, and Christ-centered love, reminding us that marriage is one of the ways God shapes us to become more like Jesus.

Through Philippians 2:3-5, we are encouraged to look beyond our own desires and consider the needs of others. Marriage reveals areas of selfishness while creating opportunities to practice humility, grace, and forgiveness. Rather than viewing marriage as a limitation, Scripture shows us that it is a gift God uses to transform our hearts and teach us how to love sacrificially.

Highlights:

• Discover how marriage reflects Christ’s sacrificial love for the Church.
• Learn why humility and selflessness are essential for a healthy marriage.
• Understand how God uses marriage to reveal and transform selfishness in our hearts.
• Be encouraged to extend forgiveness and grace to your spouse.
• Explore how God’s grace empowers us to grow in Christlikeness.
• See marriage as an opportunity to reflect Jesus through love and sacrifice.

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Full Transcript Below:

Finding the Sacrificial Beauty in Marriage

By: Emily Rose Massey

Bible Reading:

“Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 2:3-5, ESV).

Summertime in America is marked by so many celebrations and wonderful holidays: graduation parties, Memorial Day, Father’s Day, Independence Day, lots of pool days and BBQs with friends and family, and of course, weddings upon weddings! I’m sure you know at least one couple who is getting married this summer or who at least celebrate their anniversary in June, July, or August. It is truly a very popular time of year to get married– so much so that many people call it “wedding season.” I guess my husband and I wanted to go against the norm, as we so often do, and went to the opposite end of the calendar and got married in December. I truly look forward to celebrating with loved ones who “tie the knot” during this season. Almost 20 years later, I still get choked up witnessing someone else’s “big day.”

Weddings are so lovely and fun, but they clearly represent something so much more important and beautiful that the Lord has providentially ordained that we should give our attention to outside of that one special day: marriage. The union of marriage is so important to God that His word equates it to the love that Christ has for the church, His Bride (Ephesians 5:22-33).

Reflecting upon that kind of love that Christ has for His own, two words come to mind: humble and sacrificial. Christ modeled this kind of love and asks husbands and wives to walk in His footsteps. These verses in Philippians 2 capture this selflessness that we should long to foster in our homes and marriages:

“Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 2:3-5, ESV).

Intersecting Faith & Life:

I have had two situations within the last handful of months where women who were much older than me (women I should be gleaning wisdom from) painted marriage in such a terrible light and boasted in their divorces and singleness. It truly made my heart heavy that because of their personal experiences, they could not see the beauty in marriage. When they should see it as a gift from God to sanctify us and make us less selfish and more others-focused, they saw it as bondage, keeping them from living their own life freely. As Christ followers, if we want a right view of marriage, we must look to the scriptures. We cannot rely on others’ experiences or even our own to determine what God says on a matter.

The more we dive into His word, our naturally selfish minds are renewed to love sacrificially as He does, extending the same grace and mercy we have received from Him to others. The word transforms us from the inside out, all for the better, and we begin to see the fruit of the Spirit (see Galatians 5:22-23) develop and mature in our lives, which we need to fully love others in humility and sacrifice, preferring them above ourselves. What happens when our spouse hurts us? Because we have been forgiven through the cross of Jesus Christ, we must forgive others. We have received such great mercy; therefore, we must extend that same mercy to our spouse, even if they have wronged us or offended us. When we are quick to apologize because of humility and choosing the other person over ourselves, our hearts are free of bitterness, pride, and selfishness.

None of us are made of that; God gives us the grace to do that. Many people would define grace as “unmerited favor” to the undeserving, especially in terms of salvation, which is true, but it doesn’t stop there- it is God’s power to conform us into the image of Christ, and God uses marriage to make us humble and sacrificial. This grace that strengthens us and trains us is what we experience in the majority of our Christian walk: in faith and obedience, with each step, we grow in holiness and Christlikeness, day by day. Truthfully, marriage gives us countless opportunities to reflect Christ by laying down our lives for our spouse, in humility and sacrifice. Oh, how beautiful!

Further Reading:

Ephesians 5:22-33

John 13:34-35

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