What do you do when you love someone who won't stop drinking or give up their addiction? Dr. Brenda Fann Katula knows that frustration well. She understood alcohol addiction, withdrawal, and relapse. But none of that could fix her husband.

In Part 2 of this two-part interview, Brenda takes us through the final stage of her former husband's destructive behavior. From an intervention, to hallucinations, to putting on a front and doing what she could to protect her kids.

But more important than the story, she explains her deepest crisis from this period: her spiritual one. Angry that God hadn’t healed her husband or restored their family, Brenda stopped praying personal prayers and tried to solve everything herself—until exhaustion forced her to surrender. She eventually recognized, though, that her prayers had an interesting through line: they all focused almost entirely on changing her husband rather than asking God for the healing, strength, and wisdom she needed.

We talk about her faith, her frustration, and her final surrender.

We also discuss boundaries, gaslighting, unanswered prayer, repeated forgiveness, identity in Christ, and the thing her husband left behind that went from a painful reminder to a powerful retreat.

This important interview is crucial for friends and family members looking for hope.

Listen to Part 1 here.
Follow Brenda on Instagram: @brendafannkatula
Article: What does it actually look like to forgive?
Get Caroline Beidler's book for loved ones, When You Love Someone in Recovery
Get Gospel-centered addiction recovery resources and help at veritasrecovery.org
Follow me: @jonseidl
Order my book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic
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We explore:

— Why Brenda staged an intervention after her husband threatened to drive to daycare intoxicated
— How severe alcohol withdrawal led to hallucinations, a hospital escape, and an ICU ventilator
— Why Brenda pressured a doctor to keep her husband from driving their children
— What happened when unanswered prayer became anger at God
— How Brenda’s prayers shifted from changing her husband to asking God to heal and strengthen her
— Why recognizing gaslighting doesn’t eliminate the need for personal self-examination
— How forgiveness can be repeated without calling the damage acceptable
— Why her husband’s alcoholism increased her empathy for patients with addiction
— How an unfinished treehouse became a place of study, service, and redemption

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