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Hilarious 10 Commandments Of A Southern Thanksgiving

Hilarious 10 Commandments Of A Southern Thanksgiving

Comedian Matt Mitchell has shared a list of the 10 most vital, crucial steps to take and things to remember when preparing for and enjoying a Thanksgiving in the South.

Thanksgiving is generally a time for food, family and football. Like Christmas, Thanksgiving is also a day full of traditions. Now, these annual activities and customs can vary greatly by family. Also, as one comedian hilariously points out, entire regions of the United States have different ways they celebrate the November holiday.

Thankfully, Matt has shared a helpful and hysterical list for those who will enjoy Thanksgiving in a southern state in the country. He calls them his “10 Commandments of Southern Thanksgiving.”

1. Thou Shalt Bring Exactly What You Said You’d Bring

Matt states that Thanksgiving is too important to try some new, fancy take on dressing or sweet potatoes. Showing up to the meal without the correct or a decidedly different dish could result in being ostracized. 

2. Thou Shalt Fend For Yourself Thanksgiving Eve and Morning

As Matt points out, cooking a meal as extensive as Thanksgiving requires a fair amount of time and prep work. The kitchen will become a dedicated workspace for the big meal fairly early before Thursday. 

3. Thou Better Not Wait Till The Last Minute

This is a good rule of thumb for nearly every area in life, but especially at Thanksgiving. Crowds at Walmart and Kroger on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving will be a madhouse. Plan ahead and accordingly. 

4. Thou Can Leave Pretty Little Turkey or Pumpkin-shaped Plates at Home

Thanksgiving is a day for food….lots and lots of food. Everyone will naturally consume more food than is necessary. So, we need plates capable of carrying that amount of food. Those cute, pretty and small decorative plates will not cut it at Thanksgiving.

5. Do Not Covet Thy Neighbor’s Good Chair

Premium seating around the table at Thanksgiving can be limited. There is a definite hierarchy when it comes to who gets what chair. Please respect the system.

6. Honor Thy Dressing and Never Call It Stuffing

Certain parts of the country call dishes different names, including stuffing/dressing. In the South, it’s dressing, and there’s no point in arguing otherwise.

7. Honor the Egg Bowl

Football is a big deal on Thanksgiving, especially in Mississippi. Matt says that on Thanksgiving, watching Ole Miss play Mississippi State is a must.

8. Thou Shalt Not Murder

While this is an actual commandment given to Moses, it also applies to Thanksgiving in the South. On Thanksgiving, there can be disagreements and heated arguments. It’s an important commandment to remember.

9. Remember the Ice and Get an Extra Bag

No one wants a warm drink on Thanksgiving. Always have ice ready because the ice machine is likely to stop working, especially when you need it on Thanksgiving.

10. Thou Shalt Welcome Everyone

Thanksgiving is a time for family, friends and everyone in between. Southerners are a friendly bunch, so this is something to remember when enjoying Turkey Day in the South.

Psalms 107:1 “O give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; for his mercy endures forever.”

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