“You have mourned long enough for Saul. I have rejected him as king of Israel, . . . Find a man named Jesse who lives there, for I have selected one of his sons to be My king” (16:1).
I spent the summer of 1992 tumbling, somersaulting, and plowing over the waters of Strom Thurmond Lake in South Carolina. Belying any grand designs, I was simply trying to learn how to water-ski. A painful endeavor, it revealed the deep level of determination I carry within me. One of my greatest errors lay in my refusal to let go of the rope and admit defeat when I had fallen. It was not a pretty sight.
Twenty years later, far from the roar of the boat’s motor and the cool water of a hot summer day, I find myself tumbling, somersaulting, and plowing through the waters of a particular relationship to find reconciliation. Like Samuel, I have mourned over what could have been (1 Samuel 1:35). Believing the call of God was on this individual’s life to lead others into His truth, I am left confused and grieved over the events that have transpired. I’ve tried through my own determination to understand, but instead hit the water with a fierce smack. The message is clear: Let go.
Samuel could have continued to insist that he was bound to see Saul get it right, but God had appointed otherwise (16:1). The option was no longer whether Saul would obey what God had commanded, but whether Samuel would heed the voice of God in releasing Saul.
In Romans 12:18, Paul writes, “Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.” Because Jesus has set within us the message of reconciliation (2 Corinthians 2:19), we’re to do all we can to keep our relationships in right accord with the Word.
There are also occasions, however, when the right choice is separation—but only through biblical means and measures.
Read Genesis 13:6 and consider how Abraham’s decision to separate from Lot revealed the inner motivations of each man and opened the door for God’s blessing in Abraham’s life.
What are the biblical markers to indicate when a relationship is no longer healthy? How must our response to the marriage covenant be different from our response to other relationships in our lives?