Meaning MirageWhere do you typically find meaning in life?
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Growing up I went to church and loved god but never realy knew how to get to know him. So as I got to seventh grade something happend happend and I lost my desire for god and realy started to resent church. I started cusing and by the time I got to high school I had one of the most filthy mouths. Peer preasure never bothered me so when people would try to get me to drink I would just ignore them. My sophmore year I decided on my own that I wanted to try and get drunk. When I got drunk for the first time I realy liked it. After that I started trying other things like smooking, and pot. In a 9 month period I went from not drinking or smoking to drinking 2 to 3 times a week and smoking every onec in a while. The thing about it was at this time I had a huge hatred for god. I cursed him, I made fun of his people. The funny thing is now Im the one geting made fun off, but thats just fine with me. You couldnt talk to me abut jesus because I thought I knew it all. To give a quick sequece of what happedn I walked into chuch on August 26, 2007 the greatest day of my life. When I went to chuch I didnt put on a happy church face you knew I didnt want to be their. Praise and worship noting happend my pastor spoke and nothing happend. Towards the end of the service my mom went up to pray for people and I see my pastor coming towards me. I was furious and of all things he comes and sits down beside me and puts his arm aroud me. He goes son I know you have been thinking about what I said last week. He goes son gods given you a great ability to go out their on day and hit home runs like Mark McGwire and he said some other things to me but thats all I remember. Their was so many things going through my head but it wasnt because of what he said. Like I said earlier when he put his arm around I felt something for the very first time and it was the presence of god. It was on me so strong and i felt something deep inside and I felt like I wanted to cry. I wasnt a person to cry ever and I remember telling myself you are not going to crry, you are not going to cry. Gods not real he cant be real. Then my pastor asked if I wandted to accept jesus as my lord and savior. I dont know why but I said yes and I stood up and walked towards the altar and began to cry for a long period of time. When I got out of church I was thingking what have I done. My mom asked me that night if I wanted to go to church that night, I said no. I didnt even want to get saved I dont even know why I said yes. That night I went to my room and closed the door and turned on the radio to a christian radio station. Then I said to GOD if your real make yourself real to me tonight. That night the presence of god came in that room so strong and as I began to read the word it was like the words were coming to life. I had never experieced god so strong. After that night the young kid who was an atheist had a strong desire to get to know the god that he denied even existed. That night I had found the greatest friend I have ever known. After I got saved to know how good of a person I was no one called me to hang out or do anything. I was such a jerk that no one even realy liked. The only person that was there for me was Jesus and I can tell you with everything in me that he is the greatest thing that has ever happend to me. I hope as you read this that you relize that you can have a personal relationship with Jesus and it is truly awsome.